One Paragraph story... December 2 edition

I understand you think the accident was my fault. Yeah… yeah. I know I was driving. I know. I know I was driving. But, you gotta understand I can’t stop a sneeze. It was the sun. No, I’m not blaming the sun. Yes, sir; that would be silly. No, when the sun shines in my eyes it makes me sneeze. Well, no. I wouldn't say that. It’s just a thing. Like a tic maybe. I don’t know. All I am saying is I crested the hill on fifth- and come on. You know how it is there; in the Spring? The sun is right at the end of the street, just kinda sitting there. And what is with the light at this time of year? It’s brighter? How can the sun be brighter now? Is it closer? If it is closer then… yeah, yeah- how come it is not warmer. haha. You understand. Oh… you don’t. Well, like I was saying, I was heading up 5th Ave towards Carney, and boom the sun just shone in my eyes and I- pardon me? No, I suppose saying ‘boom’ is a bit inappropriate under the circumstances. Sorry. I come around the crescent and before I have a chance to think about it I sneeze. And you know, when you sneeze, you close your eyes- so I guess I closed my eyes, and tensed up and, well… yeah. Oh? three times. I sneezed three times and on the third I hit the red car. No- I don’t know cars. My car is black. It is? I drive a Jetta? That sounds like something I would drive. A Black Jetta, yup. Right. And the red car- the Hyundai, slipped on the ice and hit the mini van, and that skidded into the Petro Canada and well… so anyway, I think if you look at my record you will see that I have a very good history and this is not something I do everyday. You’re right, yes- you’re right. I do too, hope that I am not causing Gas Stations to blow up everyday. No that would make me a terrorist. haha…. no not funny. Yes, never funny. So, Officer, you see- it wasn't me that caused this unfortunate accident it was the sun… or maybe my nose. I think that when the sun shines in my eyes, I think it like, somehow tickles my nose hairs- maybe that is what it does. Hmm, I should google this. Funny- I never thought to google this. Isn't that… No, sorry. I don’t know how ICBC would want you to write this up? Is there like an involuntary accident check-box? Maybe you can just write it in. Well, that’s all I know. Am I free to go? No, you’re right. I should at least wait until the firetrucks arrive. Very true, very smart. Thank you. I’ll just wait here and look up sneezing on the internet. Thank you. Yes, thank you.

James C.